George W. Bush would like to take it up the ass
"You do know that anyone that far to the right is hiding a deep, dark secret, right?"
- Bill Hicks
Seems to be right. I for one, think that George W. Bush, the President ofthe United States of America, takes it up the ass. Why, you might ask. Well, I have a theory. At the brink of his second term as president, he signed a legislation that made same-sex marriage illegal in 11 more states. I think
he did this because he is in denial. If he can't marry a man, then noone can! And that's probably why he married a woman looking like a man.
In the deepest corners of his heart and soul he knows that he is homosexual, but because he was born and raised in a conservative home amongst people who found homosexuality to be a sin, because of, y'know, the bible, he could never realize his true self. He has also spent alot of time in Texas, one of the biggest gay-hating states in the USA. All of this has made him hide his secret his whole life, and especially in his political career. Another thing he did to conceal his secret and to make him seem more straight in the collective unconscious, was to invade Iraq and go after Saddam Hussein. What's more manly than guns, tanks, stealth bombers, armored vehicles,and troops of hundreds of thousands of soldiers, and knowing that you're in command of all this? He has declared himself as a "war president with war on his mind", and I think he did it because he's suppressing his inner urges to give Dick Cheney a reach-around. The vice president of the US, Dick, has a lesbian daughter, but he still agreed with Bush on signing the legislation that made same-sex marriages illegal in 11 more states.
In 2005, then-Secretary of State, Colin Powell resigned from his position. At the end of August 2007, Karl Rove, the man behind Bush's political strategics, and a political mastermind far on the right, resigns. Why are these powerful, wealthy men resigning from their positions? Because they were tired of Bush hitting on them of course. Hell, I'd turn gay if I had to work closely with Condoleezza Rice. She could give any man years of crippling impotence. But anyway, Bush went to war because he is in denial, and if he can't marry a man, then he'd be damned if he isn't going to give it his best effort to make sure noone else can marry the same sex.
I have nothing against homosexuals, just for the record, if anyone is getting the wrong idea. I just think this is the reason he went to war, and made an effort to make same-sex marriages illegal. I know of grown men married with women all their lives who realize that they're gay when they're in their 50's and 60's, and feel that their whole lives have been wasted because they lived in denial, not feeling confident enough in themselves to come out of the closet. Bush is trying to make the closet disappear, in the way that he is trying so hard to oppress his feelings for Karl Rove, so that one day he'll even convince himself that he's heterosexual, by means of war and legislation.
If someone gave him a blowjob and then leaked it to the press, then he'd be impeached on the same grounds they impeached Bill Clinton, only this time, the impeachment would stick, because all the conservative old curmudgeons on the Hill would not forgive something like it. If this happened, we'd be in a safer world. Amazing isn't it, we're only a fellatious experience away from a safer place to live.